Working six days a week, unlike five in most sought after professions, teaching is a demanding job. This is a sufficient reason for claiming a break once in a while. But, as you may realize, we are speaking of educational … Continue reading
Amidst peaceful silence, my mother’s meditation in the prayer hall of the colony temple was interrupted. Little girl, must be around two years, with chubby cheeks, gained freedom from her father’s tight holding fingers, and ran towards us to push my mom out of her meditation. As my mom, who just was shaken from a blissful state of silence, tried to figure out what was going on in the real world, the child innocently turned towards me. In my interpretation of what her eyes tried to talk to me, she said, “Have I seen you somewhere before?“. And so felt her actions when she touched me in different places before she shook hands with me. When all this was happening, my wife was cheering this kid, and I couldn’t resist but see a child in my wife too. All through this action, I still found time to spare some pity to my father who used the silent prayer hall and my mother’s praying time as an opportunity for a power nap.
The prayer hall had the idol of the god, Shirdi Sai Baba, in the far end with a sort of closed cabin with metal frames all around. It allowed a free view of the idol but reaching into God’s vicinity was restricted. The metal frames in the front portion had reasonable gaps between each vertical, for this girl child to venture walking through it. I guess she wanted to shake hands with God too. Wherever she went, she finally had to conquer her father’s protecting (restricting) hands, for which she had no good strength. But I observed soon enough that the kid was trying to make up for her lack of strength with persistence. The first time she was pulled back, she laid flat on the floor with her stomach to the ground, took a few deep breaths, stood up and walked towards God. The second time she was pulled back, she rested in her mother’s arms for a while, stroked her mother’s cheeks to find her freedom, and no sooner than her mother let her down, she began running for God. The third time she was pulled back, she was made to repeat, “Touching God is wrong“. She was put through an exercise of shutting her mouth with the pointing finger, as a symbol of conveying that she was making a mistake. She did that as many times as her mother did it, but was soon on her way to try her luck. Looking at all this, I am always left amazed at why god remains like an idol when kids like her come to meet; because, if I were god, I would be tempted to play with them.
In a whiff, I found that the sound of my wife’s utterances drew my attention in that rather not-so-silent prayer hall now. It was all in a joy of looking at the little girl moving in rounds in that rectangular prayer hall, not just providing different geometries but actually bringing some entertainment for everyone in there. My mom soon joined our conversation and we were talking about how cute that little girl looks. The next thing my mom says to us, “Pray god for a healthy and handsome kid“. My wife joined the chorus with my mom singing those prayers–some popular compositions and some my mom’s own. I actually enjoy listening to my mom’s compositions, but that discussion is for a different time. The little kid was drawing attention in my slightest wake in that prayer hall, and was raising interesting thoughts about my future role as a Daddy. More than that, looking at her, I was wondering if I was enjoying her play because I am becoming a Daddy soon, or was it just in how kids play with us. She was now clapping and stamping her foot in a rhythm looking to the ground and following the pattern on the floor. I was already eagerly waiting for her to make an eye contact. I wasn’t aware of this so much then as I am now, but surely I was.
Time is the worst interruption to most beautiful moments in life. I was soon thinking about the movie we had to go to, and we had only twenty minutes to make it to the theater. Brain is a wicked witch. It first reminds of the things that strip away joy from life, and then it makes me struggle to stick to the joyous moment I know I would be missing the next moment. A little confused with my feelings, and a tad irritated, I reminded my parents and my wife, who still had their attention split between God and this little girl, about the movie. May be God isn’t so cruel, or perhaps he wanted to make me feel better–the little girl’s parents left the prayer hall before we even made our effort to stand up to move out. Before leaving, the parents had the kindness to give us an extra moment of joy, when they brought the kid to us asking her to give us a ‘good-bye‘ shake. With smiles on her face, the little girl moved out of our sight. And we went to the movie.
The movie was entertaining; but that little kid’s smile, and the smile of the kids in my wife and my mom are still holding my attention. The space in my heart was supposed to be filled with peaceful silence on a holiday after a visit to temple and watching an entertaining movie, but my silence is peacefully broken by their smiles. I could consider having such distractions forever. 
He looked at the lifeless toy and clapped in excitement. It was perhaps the amusement of seeing an engineering marvel function in ways that his child brain could not grasp. He grew up to be an expert in creating such engineering wonders. No wrong if one thought he was passionate in what he does.
Years of hardwork went into giving shape to his dreams. His mighty machine was ready to work, to give light to the world, a new direction to science. Just like when he was a kid, all he had to do now was to push the button. His mind was on a high and his heart thumped heavier inside. With a minute long hold of breath he suddenly released, he pushed the button. The expectation of seeing his machine work was much higher than the playful act of assembling his toys expecting them to do something. Seconds after he pushed the button, he realized something was not right! His heart now thumped faster. Hands moved in all directions, eyes looked all around, brain wandered across years of effort to find where he could have missed the link to make this machine work. His feet felt lighter; trembling, his body was all down on his knees the next minute. Answers were not to be found. Their nature is to go missing when they are most required!
Sorrow, silence and disbelief took over for the next few moments. Fleeting emotions were hurting more than the hope that the machine might work if he just found something trivial he feels he missed. How does hope diminish faster when we need it most? All positivity in the world seems selfish that it runs away when someone seeks it. Eventually, rage took over his mind.
And just like a kid, in that spur of the moment, he hit the machine hard. Another moment of disbelief struck him as the machine began working its might. A few more fleeting emotions, brighter this time; and again, like positivity is selfish, when he did not seek it now, it comes back. The smile decorates his face. He walks away proudly, the winner.
One question remains for us. Was it his childish belief and his passion that made the machine work, or was it his knowledge of where to hit the machine that made it work? He keeps walking away, doubtless in his dreams.
Keep dreaming. Keep working.
