Category Archives: Oscillating Mind

Category with no specific purpose. Surprisingly, my goal is simpler now.

Rainbow: Excitement and Disappointment

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When Hemavati, a student of mine, shouted ‘Rainbow, Rainbow‘, all heads with a feel for beauty have instinctively turned towards it. Obvious is the rarity of occasions when one finds a rainbow, and even more obvious is one’s getting excited on its sight. I am a cloud watcher, however amateur in that. So,  I had a special moment and perhaps a little more fascination than others when I watched the scene; in a dark hilly and cloudy background that is uninterrupted from where I stood, a large open space. For about seven minutes, the scene has veered my head into it wherever I moved, after which it disappeared slowly in the shade of the evening.

I came back home and began pursuing my new found habit of trying to find correct answers to crazy questions. Here was one, ‘how does a rainbow form, and if I could run towards it as fast as I can, can I touch it?‘. I have entered the first part of the question in google and found that it is answered many times before. While more answers were based in physics (which I find hard to understand, occasionally), I found this page (animations) giving me a reasonable idea of the process involved. They call it the mysteries of light, not to mean that rainbow formation is a mystery, but perhaps to mean that it is a fascinating natural phenomenon. But for the second part of the question, I had to read into the physics more than I would have liked to. At the first front, I figured out that rainbow cannot be touched because it is not a physical object. Well! I kind of knew it already because we were dealing with light and light cannot be touched (it can only be seen). But then, what I meant, when I wanted to touch it, was to see if I could go so close to it that I could be where the rainbow begins or ends (remember the inverted parabola shape in which it comes; see this for example). However, even that is not possible, because to anyone who observes the rainbow, the angle and the distance at which it is seen is more or less predetermined (somewhere between 40 to 43 degrees; the angle between your looking straight and your looking up into the rainbow). Details about why it is so could be of interest to physicists or the scholars from optics, but I am not one in there! (By the way, wiki seems to offers good information about rainbow)

So, the excitement of having seen the rainbow, ends in a disappointment that rainbow cannot be touched. I wonder if I am really correct when I said ‘Knowledge is a curse‘, perhaps in disguise.

Shopping Malls or Ration Outlets!?

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In the last week, I had two instances where my shopping activity was for less than twenty minutes but the time for which I had to stay in the billing queue has exceeded forty minutes. What an irony when I think of it that I was in two of the bigger malls in Vizag, Big Bazar and Spencers. I found a couple of things extremely disappointing at these places whether others have observed them or not. Firstly, not all kiosks where billing could happen would be used; which means there is a scope for processing more number of bills per minute, but that capacity is not leveraged. Secondly, there is no one kiosk that can operate for quick dispatch of customers who purchase less than two or three items. This concept has grown popularly with the rise of malls, because such customers would want to get out of the mall as early as they could. Invariably, these are customers who come well-planned with limited requirements and want to enter fast moving queues. So, to find that there are no such kiosks in these malls felt rather unprofessional too.

On top of this, I have a crazy question again! Don’t these guys use any operations research model to see if they can improve their performance on how these queues are dealt with? Perhaps, they don’t. And perhaps there is no point in asking such questions.

At Spencers, where there was a queue with about twenty customers in line, I patiently waited for thirty minutes before there were only two customers ahead of me. A young lady rushed into the queue saying she has to go out, and that she is not purchasing any thing. So, with an understanding that her rush might not hamper us in the queue, myself and the customers ahead had let her go. To our dismay, she comes up with a bag of goods for billing–a bag that her cousin was holding on the other side of the kiosk. Her idiotic behavior disturbed the moods of customers standing in the queue for a long time already by then. I, for one, wanted to slap her hard and tell her, ‘it is wrong not to follow the queue, and it is almost criminal to leverage on the patience of honestly waiting customers”. When the customers ahead raised the issue, all this young lady did was to lick her tongue out and say, ‘aeeyh‘ in an ugly tone and walk away once her billing was done. How idiotic the executive at the kiosk must have been to take her billing ahead of customers in the queue! I guess these things do happen, more frequently in places that are not yet civilized.

Another crazy thought in my mind: Can we change this ration outlet behaviour of the customers and make them dignified shoppers?

The Moon Illusion

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Looking up into the skies, I had this crazy question tickling my mind: why does moon look smaller one day and bigger the next day (literally! I am not referring to the new moon to full moon changes or vice versa, but the moon really looks big on occasions). You might ask me why I had such a crazy question. It is simple. I tried capturing an image of moon that is colorful and appealing to the eye.  I have seen people do it with better cameras, but then better cameras cannot make the moon larger, like some of the pictures show [1,2,3].

Trying to figure out the answer and rest my curious mind in peace, I knelt down in google search. And here it comes! The explanation (or no explanation perhaps!) seems to be called as ‘The Moon Illusion‘. My experience with Wikipedia has not been great so far, so I wanted to validate the theories further. And continuing my search for another twenty minutes or so has given me sufficient evidence that there is information cluttered all over the internet about the moon illusion. {I recall reading something that spoke about three types of people. In this case, I belong to the third type–those who wonder what happened. I also wonder what explanation some teachers might offer to those kids who share this question and curiosity}.

Getting back to the point about change in size of the moon, I am amazed to find that there is plenty of research work happening in this area. They call it an illusion because the moon appears larger when it is close to the horizon, whereas logically it has to look the same size (recall the lesson ‘our universe’; we are dealing with spherical objects called earth, moon, and orbits). That NASA also fails to explain why this illusion happens is a bit of a surprise, but then surprises are expected with tough (simple) questions. Just imagine! If someone were to find an answer to this question (might be simple too), even that would be a surprise. ;) And don’t be surprised when I tell you that there are people who want to claim the credit for having already answered the question (they almost forget that there is a section of scientists who should review their answers and test them). From what I read so far, there are two theories which make a reasonable attempt in explaining the phenomenon: the ponzo illusion and the flattened sky illusion.

Getting back to what matters most… Have I got what I wanted? The answer is a definite ‘No’. But I think I found something way more fascinating. :D

A day well-planned

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Early in the morning today marked the official beginning of a week full of holidays. And the first activity–you may have already guessed it–I made a list of to-do’s for the day and for the week ahead. Broadly, the idea was to get the house reasonably organized, so that I could focus on my thesis write up and finish a meaty chunk of it. It was a well-crafted plan with details of what should be done, precisely.

As it turns out, I wake up late because it is a rare and long holiday I get. And then I realize there are too many things that make me want to go to work instead of staying home. After paying due respects to mutilated clothes that rested in the bin for a week, we moved out to a buggy hotel for our breakfast. Our journalist uncle meets us there. On the way back to our house, he joins us–and what pleasure in learning Adobe Photoshop when he teaches. I picked up a couple of points about how to work on black and white pictures without losing much detail. That was fun, but it was already past lunch time by then!

After a very delayed lunch (or perhaps an evening snack), I take my soulmate for a style check at Jawed Habib’s in Vizag. Twenty minutes after we entered there, we walked out, and I had a gorgeous young lady by my side–a completely refreshing look of my soulmate. And then, my crazy brain needed some food for thought, and we walked into a book exhibition. I bought four books: one, that is entertaining for a read, two, that is useful to improve my writing skills, three, which can satiate my research interests, and four, which I should be reading in my newly wed life. Carrying those books and walking into a theater expecting to have tickets available for ‘Bodyguard’ ended as an effort in vain; for the theater was not screening the movie. A brief stint on the side of the beach road was a reasonable substitute to the movie plan, and then… here I am, back to blogging.

Well! As you can see, my day was rather well-planned. I planned, but it did not work. Someone else (perhaps God!) had different plans for making my day entertaining, and that might have worked (There are other ways I could have explained why my planning did not work, but I am happy for now with this ‘God’s Plan’ option.

Let me guess! That is how your day has also been. Right?

Unusual but…

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Over the last few days, since I joined MVGR College of Engineering, I am seeing a significant change in the way I lead my life, I set my priorities, and I speak with people around me. Perhaps, it is too short a time to comment on their consistency, but the change was definitely unexpected yet pleasant. For example, my last two posts were in Telugu–which I think is my new preference, though I am trying to figure out if it is really so.

Let me go through a few things that have caught my attention in the first week of work at the new place. First of them all, I have a male superior for the first time in my career so far. Second, I am now a part of an organization that defines its structure and functions with clarity and precision. Third, I am in an organization that encourages community style of living and working. Above all, to my pleasant surprise, the institution encourages research and incentivises every individual’s research output (most institutions in our country, each of which claims to be number one, actually fail to do this!). For a difference, I recall some of my past colleagues, now friends, telling me that quality of university students is much better compared to students from an affiliated college such as MVGR. There were few who denied buying that point. I see now that those few were accurate in their observation. Quality of students I see in this college is surely a notch superior compared to students I found in some other reputed institutions, both in academics and professionalism.

I just recall, I have done this exercise of trying to figure out the number of differences between my some of the earlier institutions I worked with and my current institution. When I put up on Facebook that I might be able to write a hundred reasons for joining this institution, I may not have been this serious. But now, I guess I am. I spent five minutes to jot down the differences which come to my mind, and have ended up with a list of more than thirty differences ranging from pre-joining arrangements made to the kind of welcome given to the kind of clarity in job role and freedom given for pursuing what I like.

Let me come back to why I titled the post ‘Unusual but…’. Over the last one week, blogging is not finding itself on my priority list–may be that is how much I fell in love with work here. That is unusual. Contributing to scholarly community and earning rich qualifications is one of my goals for sure, forever; but all of a sudden I find myself with better goals–to be a humble and lovable being. That is not so unusual, but can I be it? Can I change myself? I do not know. I am trying, because for once I am convinced about changing my direction of experimentation in life–to try why right things are right. Now, that is so unusual! But I think I like what I am going through… or am I just like that always! :)

Matter of Leaving

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Context provokes! Some recent experiences motivate me to retrospect about my leaving organizations, quite a few of them so far. A discussion with one of my friends (an old colleague too!) finally made me decide, I would be writing this–a recall of my experiences in leaving the organizations, reasons why I have left them, how I made those decisions, and how my decisions turned out to be. I have to caution here, to all those readers who are introspecting about their prospects of leaving an organization, that I think I am still too young to comment on these. But this effort is to clarify to myself, a few vague thoughts plaguing my mind.

Tata Chemicals: Ashish Pant was the HR Manager, and he was also my project guide at Mumbai. I was one among the six or eight interns selected to work with the organization for a couple of months in that year, 2006. I resigned from there after putting in close to forty-five days. Could not live through the last fifteen! I am still surprised at what I was thinking. When my manager asked me if I thought my decision was right, since all work places might be the same; I emphatically declared to him, “world is sufficiently big, and I would find a place that can take me in”. Today, his claim seems more valid than my assertion. Funny, but true! But did that decision hurt me? Really not. There are two reasons for this I think: firstly, it was internship, and not a job; secondly, those who have gone on to finish are really no better today. But both reasons are not really the right ones to make a quitting decision or even to justify it, as I understand today.

Intergraph Consulting: Vandana V was the HR Manager, and my project guide again. This place is a little different. Located at Hyderabad, fitting all my requirements for a good organization, this was a place fun to work at. I did finish my project before moving out. But I consider my decision of not accepting the job offer made to me, as perhaps the biggest mistake in my career. At that time, I had large number of offers to choose from, and the sole criteria (or the most tempting one!) was the salary offered. I chose Satyam Computers. What I did not realize was the value of joy of working and becoming family with the organization. Would I have been happy if I accepted the offer? May not be forever, but surely, by the time I am not happy, I would have learnt dealing with it.

Satyam Computers: Ravi Meduri was my manager in the first spell, and Ramana Tatavarthy in the second. My entire stint at Satyam was a walk in smoke with feet on fire, I must say. The decision to quit came when my dream invited me, a position in HR Team. Surprising it may be, but true! The conflict between my boss, and the HR Manager who wanted to take me into his team showed its affects on me, and I had to call the shots for once. When you know you can’t win the fight, the only other wise (or so I thought!) alternative is to quit. I did. Am I happy with the decision? No. Am I feeling bad about the decision? Not quite. Do I now think my decision was bad? Not really, but then I do miss the facilities of working with an organization that huge. Should I have considered staying? May be Yes, but then the fiasco that followed turned out my decision as a really wise one.

ATG Organizational Consulting Services: Chandu Sambasiva Rao was the director I reported to as a senior consultant in a small organization. Frankly, I found myself over qualified at this place. While it was true that I enjoyed talking and learning from Chandu (he was a consultant with Booz Allen for a long time), there was nothing much that motivated me to stay there. The decision to quit was long drawn with a decline in my efforts making my intentions clear. I have never considered leaving this place was bad, but then this was the time I realized the importance of working with an organization like Intergraph. But it was too late!

Ebenzer Consulting Private Limited: I was my own manager. I was making decisions. I was also working with another organization called Jayasimha Mind Dynamics, more for a consistent stream of income than for anything else. I did achieve things which I thought were out of my abilities, such as conducting a National Memory Championship with attendance exceeding two thousand–and I recall, I was assisted by only a couple of other hands in making up this show. The same confidence and zeal were put in Ebenzer, but I was missing something. I realized it was what I wanted to be, a teacher. Making the organization passive, and moving into academics seemed the right decision. The source of inspiration being my father, I would always think I made a right decision in this.

Top Universities in the World Vs. GITAM University: This was a tough decision to make. But I had one point clear in my head; that if I can’t achieve something staying with my parents who encourage me, then my dreams of achieving something in their absence is merely an illusion. And I had to meet the love of myself and tell her “I am here for you”. GITAM became the choice!

Full-time PhD Vs. Part-time PhD: The objective in coming to GITAM was to be employed as a teacher, and pursue my doctoral work in a part-time mode. But since recruitment does not happen at our will, I was (ill)advised to take up full-time doctoral work on a promise that I would be taken in as a teacher when the first opportunity comes. So they came, but only to be killed! After sixteen months, my proposal for research fellowship was killed, and an offer to be a teaching associate was made. Things were becoming clear that the system needed a teacher who could entertain a class of students, but not really someone who could publish and prove to be an able scholar. My goal was clear too, to be a well-read scholar first, without which I do not comprehend the idea of being an inspiring teacher. I had to make my decision to quit. I have now joined MVGR College of Engineering.

Many people asked me questions/presented their views on this decision. I have answered them/explained my perspective on a person to person basis. I am presenting them here too.

  1. Going from a University to an affiliated college is bad on resume.
    1. True. But staying in a University and not publishing too makes my resume equally damaging. Moreover, the affiliated college I have joined is a 160 year old institution, compared the university which is 30 years old. So, I assume better administration.
  2. Research is encouraged more in University than in an affiliated college.
    1. Being a Section 3 University does not give the scholars from that university, an opportunity to seek funding from UGC. However, a scholar, even from an affiliated college of an established university, could still get what he needs–on merit basis. Anyway, funding is a distance away from where I am. And publishing is more an individual effort, than a matter of institutional affiliation.
  3. Full-time to part-time conversion means delayed doctoral degree.
    1. Understood. But I am buying it, because a doctoral degree without sufficient conference attendance and networking may mean little.
  4. Quality of students in a university is much better.
    1. Couple of respected faculty members did not want to buy that statement. Nor do I take it. At the affiliated college level, I guess, discipline is out there too.
  5. Do you think this is a wise decision?
    1. I do not know. It depends on how things turn out in the next couple of years. Keep it simple: the notion of informed decision is flawed. If I were guaranteed a good future, I would have stayed back in my first organization. Since one can never see into future, decision depends on hope that is beyond information available while making it. I am hoping! So will you when you make a quitting decision–any decision for that matter.
I think now, I should have titled the post — a matter of hoping!